Here's a photo showing Maria making the most of her fixed tangible assets! Geddit?!

And here's an article that appeared a week before she did at the Capital awards...

Don't you just love her?

She had an amazing boob job, and does look a lot sexier than she used to, but whoa, watch out for that IQ.

The piano is a nice touch. It's not clear from the piece, but she owns a white piano that once belonged to Marilyn Monroe herself. So maybe we can understand why she might think the spirit of Marilyn lives on in it. Wonder what sort of things she said?

'Get a boob job, get a boob job...' !?!

The big question is whether or not Mariah has developed a piano phobia as a result? It might make concerts a bit tricky. She comes on stage, the first chords to I can't live ring out, and she freaks: 'No, no, keep that piano away from me...'

Here's another gratuitous piccie for you!! Look out, I'm starting to think like a tabloid editor...